Halloween is a time for scaring. These days horror films are so realistic and bold, that we’ve grown accustomed to them with time. But I’ve assembled for you here the scariest horror films that can be found on YouTube. We’re talking celebrity horror here.

Lindsay Lohan at the beach, starring the pale and grim ghost of the notorious firecrotch witch:

Jessica Simpson in When Boobs Attack:

Young Angelina Jolie making baby steps with her plans to conquer the world :

After watching Posh Spice singing, expect a phone call from a stranger saying: “7 days…”

Tom Cruise trying to hypnotize the innocent by dancing. Extremely brutal:

And a Halloween treat (or trick, you decide):

Photo courtesy of People

Isn’t she lovely? When I see pictures of Lindsay going to parties I so wish I was a Mexican valet dude taking her car keys. I’d duplicate them and jerk off in her car. Jesus, I just made myself wanna puke real hard. Shit.

* Celebrities and their Halloween. Oh so scary

Photo via Perez

No, it’s not Ashtray Simpson. It’s not Madge. It’s another kind of whore. It’s Courteny Love on Pop magazine cover. I think I like this version of her much better:

Is Jennifer Lopez losing weight? She better watch out. She stands out in the Hollywood crowd cause of her curves (and her dwarf husband), so she should look after them, not try to eliminate them.

Photo courtesy of Yahoo Movies

After 7 years of marriage (that’s like 108 in Hollywood years), Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe decided to split. This is the official word from their rep: “We are saddened to announce that Reese and Ryan have decided to formally separate. They remain committed to their family and we ask that you please respect their privacy and the safety of their children at this time.”

“What went wrong” is the question on everyone’s lips. I think he just realized he’s that much hotter than she is. But naturally, there are talks of betrayal (Ryan’s) and gayness (again, Ryan’s). If there really is shit, it’ll float in the next few days. I’ll be here to grab it for you.

You might’ve noticed I sold my soul to the devil and started advertising on the blog. What can I do, you know? Writing shit about Lindsay Lohan don’t pay no rent. I love Celeb Slap and wanna keep it going for ever, but I need some cash to make it happen.

So this should explain the appearance of these badges at the end of some posts. Now for the badges themselves: These weird boxes are actually a way for you to download ringtones directly to your cell phone. 

Let’s take it slow and explain how you do it: If you see a ringtone that interests you, simply enter your phone number, select your carrier and push the “Get it” button (it won’t take you anywhere you don’t wanna go.)

Next, you will receive an SMS with a private pin code that you’ll need to enter in the badge itself. Enter the pin code, hit download and in just a few moments you’ll get the stuff directly to your mobile. Dreamy, right?

Feel free to start off with some Halloween spirit:

Photo courtesy of Wireimage

I guess it’s true what they say about pregnancy – it does change people. Marcia Cross was probably thinking about her upcoming babies’ innocence and decided to get rid of some of her nudity pics, only she must have forgotten the world she lives in. Otherwise, I cannot explain what made her believe the best way to dispose of them would be to simply toss them away.

The people working at the Rush & Molloy carting firm could’ve never asked for a better job benefit, since as for today, they are the happy owners of 200 nude photos of the hot red-haired Desperate Housewife. Not the kind of thing we’d expect from Bree Van De Kamp / Hodge.

Marcia might find some comfort in the fact that the company’s representative assured us her curtains match the carpet. Phew, I must say that kinda got me worried there for a second.

Marcia’s attorney claims that the pics were tossed out by mistake. Makes sense, you know.  Sometimes, when I’m a bit dizzy with morning sickness, I get to go out and expose myself in public in front of everybody as well. By mistake, of course.

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Photo courtesy of The Daily Mail

 Whitney Houston is out and about and looking fab. This is her at a benefit for diabetes research that took place two days ago in Beverly Hills. She’s so clean it’s probably safe to eat straight off her.

Isn’t it amazing? She makes a decision to dump Bobby Clown, and all of a sudden her life turns upside down. “I feel great”, she said. Amen to that.

Man, I just came off as a lame fat ass. Sorry bout that, I’ll do a Paris Hilton post for the balance.

Photos courtesy of Vogue and Zvezdi

What the hell happend here?

Photo courtesy of Egotastic

If you J simpson is all about life in front of the cameras, you’re so wrong. Jessica’s is really into photography, and likes it behind the lenses.

Recently, during a vacation with her sister Ashtray in London, someone explained to Jess how to work the on/off button on the cameras. It was love at first sight, or putting it in Jessica’s words: “I took pictures of the sky and landscapes. I’m very into photography at the moment.”

Would someone please tell her that landsacpes is not when a guy feels you up?