channel KTUU in Anchorage, Alaska. It was actually a job she was comparatively qualified for as she was the star player on her 1982 high school basketball team, earning the nickname “Sarah Barracuda” for her tenacious defense.

Which I guess is a slightly better aquatic nickname than her teammate Molly “gots crabs” Hershowitz.

Anyway, when I said this was a brief career, I really meant brief. Sarah Palin was reportedly a sports intern at KTUU-TV from between March and May 1988, and this is thought to be the only time she ever made it on air.

You can see the video here.

(Sorry I couldn’t embed it but the combination of Wordpress and YouTube hate me.)

So “I Kissed A Girl” might be one of the worst pop songs I’ve ever heard, but my real problem with Katy Perry is how cynically opportunistic she is. She’s the daughter of two pastors, not the slightest bit lesbian, but is such a fame whore she’d get down on all fours for an entirely different species if she thought it would sell a couple more records.

But as much as I hate Katy Perry’s fake lesbian posturing, I can’t really fault her on the bestiality stuff. I mean if all men are like dogs, doesn’t that mean that all dogs are like men anyway?

Which would mean really she’s just kissing a guy here, while on the other hand my own boyfriend is really hairy, never seems to pick up his own crap either, and dog breath is the most charitable thing I could call his breath in the morning.

Back to Katy’s BF though… in her song “UR So Gay” she sings “you’re so gay, but you don’t even like boys…” - so if her boyfriend doesn’t like other guys, does that mean her boyfriend does like male dogs?

(It’s hard understanding what Katy Perry means, when her lyrics are so very sophisticated.)

Via Katy Perry’s own tumblr blog.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve probably heard that John McCain has chose Sarah Palin, both the hottest and most obscure governor in America as his running mate for the White House. The Democrats couldn’t manage to get a woman on their ticket, but the GOP did - it’s like we’re living in a political Twilight Zone.

Anyway, the first thing that’s jumping out about Sarah Palin to people is that she’s a former beauty pageant contestant. Now she wasn’t a winner, there aren’t going to be many of those in the Republican party this Fall in general, but she was the first runner up in the Miss Alaska Pageant in 1984, which is how she paid for college.

Though over 20 years have past since her pageant days, the high cheeked 44-year-old posed in Vogue magazine last year, and could easily pass as Tina Fey’s slightly older sister.

It’s nice to have such a fresh face front and center in the political scene; I mean maybe her politics are from another century, she’s pro-life, for Alaskan drilling, and anti gay marriage, but at least these archaic views are finally being delivered by a more attractive messenger.

I don’t get the idea of having a plus sized Wonderbra model, I mean if you have size D to G breasts why do you need to make them look bigger? But anyway, Wonderbra hired sized 12 British model Katie Green as the face of their new campaign last July and already it’s backfiring.

Pictures of Katie, 20, with lesbian porn stars Kayleigh Thewlis and Tabatha Gilpen, Katie is the brunette in the middle, have just been leaked to News of the World and were taken in Portugal just weeks before she landed her Wonderbra gig. And there’s more!

A sex tape of Katie Green playing with herself before a tryst with ex-fiance Martyn Hope was also sold to News of the World. Here’s Hope describing what sex with the Wonderbra model was like:

“She always loved lingerie and dressed up in stockings and suspenders for me. I’d come home from work and find her in bed all dressed up.

“I’d take off my work clothes and we’d have great sex.

“She was such a sexy girl. She let me take a video of her fondling her boobs on the sofa one night before we made love. I’ll cherish it as she has the most amazing body I’ve seen.”

The couple broke up last October and it seems as soon as Green had a sniff of fame, he couldn’t wait to rat her out. Way to stay classy Martyn.

As for Green’s job security, Wonderbra’s other newest featured model, Dita Von Teese, has a well known hardcore lesbian sex tape, so if Wonderbra didn’t fire Teese, I see no reason why they’d axe Green.

Via

The term butter face gets thrown around a lot (everything but her face), when an equally prevalent phenomena is women who are lookers, just as long as you don’t look below their neck.

Case in point, Julia Roberts. She’s made as much as $25 million dollars per movie off her T-Rex sized smile, but has a body so badly in need of Photoshop, that the only men’s magazine she could be a cover girl for is Sarah Plain and Tall.

Seriously, it’s all in the numbers. On Pretty Woman, body double Donna Scoggins was the one featured in all those sexy close ups; the film’s worldwide gross - $463 million. For Charlie Wilson’s War; Roberts slipped into a bikini herself, and even with inflated ticket prices, the movie only made $114 million worldwide.

It’s true that since making Pretty Woman she’s had four children, seen here on vacation with her in Hawaii, but you can’t use the kids for sympathy after naming them Hazel and Phinnaeus.

You just can’t.

Via

I don’t know at exactly what age that holding hands with your father goes from cute to creepy, but I do know that at 15, Miley Cyrus has long since passed it.

And the emo haircut actually looks worse on Billy Ray than the old mullet did. These pictures were taken while they were celebrating his 47th birthday, why is he still dressing like a teenager?

I can’t even make fun of these two anymore… they’re just too creepy.

Via

Alicia Sacramone, front and center, might have cost America a Gold Medal and be generally useless as athlete, but she was still by far most popular and most desired gymnast we sent to Beijing.

The secret to her hotness? Um… at age 20, she was like the only female gymnast who was actually legal. Not to disparage gymnast Nastia Liukin, who’s standing in the pink bikini next to her; she’s also hot … in a JonBenet Ramsey sort of way.

Anyway, not exactly sure when this picture was taken, only that by managing to post it the day AFTER the Olympics ended, I’m definitely a bronze medal blogger.

Via

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate babies or anything but when I heard People and Hello Magazine paid a record 14 million dollars for pictures of Brad and Angelina’s genetically perfect twins I wanted to puke.

I mean I know it’s miracle that something finally escaped Jolie’s vagina after years of it being the black hole of celebrity pussy, but it turns out that People sold 2.6 million copies of that damn magazine, making it the fourth highest selling issue of People ever.

It only ranks behind 9-11, Princess Diana’s car accident, and the JFK JR. plane accident. On the plus it’s the highest selling issue of People ever that didn’t revolve around someone dying. On the other hand, even Osama bin Laden deserves more press than Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline.

Yeah bin Laden is an evil terrorist but at least he accomplished something with his life. And don’t you think the Jolie twins getting $14 million dollars from a magazine just for existing has a little something to do with why the rest of the world hates us so much?

Look I’m sure that $14 million will end up given to charity, but if you give $14 million to a charity called the Jolie-Pitt Foundation, in the name of your newborn children, like they’re God’s gift to humanity; well is that about giving to charity or stroking your massive fucking ego?

Via